One child is easier than 2. Look at how happy my baby was when he was the one and only.

Here is a rant I posted on my facebook the other day. Thought I would share:

I’m so tired! I had last week off with the kids, but it felt like more work than work itself.
Here is the run down:
You wake up
Feed the kids breakfast (with Katy this requires lots of prep having to chop everything)
Pester the big kid to get dressed and brush his teeth
Keep the little kid for climbing on the dining room table and killing herself.
Wash the dishes (or throw them in the dishwasher while the little kid is trying to climb into the dishwasher in a futile attempt to grab the knives)
Get little kid down for a nap
Get big kid off of the Wii so he can clean his room and see the sun.
Prep for lunch
Have one of the neighbor kids come over right as you are about to serve lunch
Have the big kid eat like crap because he’s mad that he has to eat lunch and not play RIGHT THEN.
Have little kid start throwing cut up mango all over the floor.
Clean up floor with steam mop while little kid is trying to scald herself with the steam.
Give up trying to mop the floor because the little kid is climbing on your computer chair and changing all your file names to “////////]]]]{kjki”
Big Kid is playing with his friend in his room and you are picturing the mess that is being made.
Little kid is screaming at his door because she wants to play too.
You send all the kids outside because you think it’s easier.
Little kid picks up clods of dirt to taste them.
Big Kids start playing “football” and being a bit too rough and they start whining telling on each other.
Little kid starts ripping out the flowers in the planter.
You send everyone back inside.
Neighbor kid goes home. You are kind of relieved, but then your big kid gets bored and seeking attention from you.
You realize that you didn’t clean up dishes after lunch and kitchen is going to be super messy once you are done with dinner
You prep for dinner.
Little kid starts pulling on your pant leg and pointing to the bag of M&M’s
You start to wonder if you are a good parent if you feed your 13 month old M&M’s.
Your big kid starts whining that his dinner is too “spicey” even though it is the most bland spaghetti dinner ever made. Also the strawberry lemonade tastes like it’s “too ripe.” You threaten to give the kid water instead of juice. He drinks the lemonade. The spaghetti also becomes palatable once it’s covered with about 2 inches of parmesan cheese.
Little kids starts dropping cauliflower on the floor and pointing at the goldfish crackers.
You wonder why you left the goldfish crackers on the counter.
You get all the dishes in the sink and forget trying to wash them for the time being.
You get little kid bathed and in pajamas.
You fight off the big kid’s excuses to not take a bath and brush his teeth.
You get little kid down for bed.
You hang out with the big kid for a little bit and play Mario Kart.
You and the big kid take turns reading a bed time story. Big kid goes to bed.
You don’t know what to do with yourself and sit down on the couch with your iPad.
You fall asleep on the couch using your iPad as a pillow. You her your husband come home, but that iPad is just so comfortable.
You wake up just enough to change into sleepwear and a half ass attempt to brush your teeth. You wonder if maybe you should read, but your neck hurts from sleeping weird… Maybe you should take a shower? This might be your best chance.
The baby wakes up. You fall asleep rocking the baby.
Good Morning! Rinse. Repeat.